Monthly Archives: April 2013

You Are So Lovable – Feel It

Last Monday my husband left a sweet note on my windshield while I was teaching a yoga class as he works nearby that site.  I’m not posting this to brag and be all, “Hey everyone, see how amazing my husband is blah blah blah.”  My real point here is to inspire you  – in my youth (which was everything up to 35) I never thought I could have love like this.  Actually I wasn’t even sure it existed.  But in my heart I knew that that kind of love is what I wanted and needed in order to get married to someone.  It had to be out there.

One day I just kind of woke up and realized that instead of focusing on all the evidence of me not being loved, having my heart broken, being disappointed, insulted, made fun of, stood up, etc. that I would instead to choose to focus my thoughts and energies on all the evidence and proof that I was loved and am lovable.  I recalled the times my family and schoolmates were caring and sweet to me.  I recalled when men were trying to express their love to me, but my eyes were closed to it.  I woke up to all the evidence of love in my life NOW.

All it takes is a shift to be in the loving space you want and here are some ways to do that now:

1)    Collect evidence of you loving and being loved in the past, and I don’t mean sexually, I mean words and actions of love.  Think of any family members, friends, peers, co-workers, children, babies and animals (even plants!) that have shown you love.  Love is everywhere.  Honestly, I talk lovingly to my car and she shows me love by doing what she’s supposed to do well and safely.

2)    See the proof of love around you, particularly if you’re looking for your soul mate, in other couples that have the kind of loving relationship you want.  As much as possible only watch media with the kind of love you truly want, as it will reinforce your knowing that you are deserving of that love.  Two of my personal favorites are Wally and the beginning of Up.

3)    Bask in the feelings of that kind of love.  As you become more accustomed to this feeling being the norm, the other stuff that isn’t what you want will just seem to go away at just the right time or it won’t draw your attention as much anymore.  Your feelings are your guide and you’re here on this planet to feel good!

What evidence of love in your past or present are you basking in?  I would love to read all about it in the comments below.

Love, love, love,

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Three Questions to Begin Deliberately Attracting Your Soul Mate

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In the last post I wrote about the difference between the common default attraction versus deliberately attracting your soul mate.  The fun part now is the process of, in Abraham-Hicks words, deliberately creating your ideal partnership.  I say it’s fun because it can be like a game where you allow your imagination to roam free.  Actually the better you feel and more excited you get and the more fun you have about achieving your ideal desire, the quicker the manifestation is likely to occur.  Always keep in mind what Rumi said, “What you seek is seeking you.”  If you’re having fun and feeling good then that will seek you, too!

Here are three questions and steps to get you started on your journey:

1)    What is it that you really want in an ideal partnership?

Get precisely clear on what you want the nature of the relationship to be (like married or unmarried but living together, children or not), the type of partner you want to be with, and how you see your life together.  I know there’s a popular myth out there that a woman should “just be cool” until she knows how the guy feels about her – but that is the complete opposite of being a deliberate creator.  Waiting for someone to decide what he or she wants with you is not honoring the lovable and powerful person you truly are.  If you apply, “What you seek is seeking you” then being anything other than who YOU are when seeking your ideal love is going to draw inauthentic, unclear or wishy-washy love back to you – and can lead to heartbreak further down the road.  Be clear on what it is you truly want.

2)    Why do you want your ideal partnership?

Knowing why you want something fuels the energy behind your desire.  It also can tell you if what you’re asking for is in your highest interests.  If your reasons for wanting to be with your ideal partner are based in love and feel good – for example, wanting to be with someone because, “I want to express love with someone every day,” then you’ll attract a partner that wants the same good feeling.  If you ask why and your answer is fear-based, for example because, “I don’t want to be alone,” then you’ll also attract a partner that has the same fear based feeling.  “What you seek is seeking you,” so remember that you will attract a partner that wants a relationship for the same reasons (whether you realize it or not).  Also being clear on why you want your ideal relationship will further clarify what it is you want and simplify the process of dating and looking.

3)    How do you want to feel when you are in your ideal partnership?

Now we’re getting down to the important stuff when it comes to being a powerful creator in our lives.  It’s all about feelings.  In our analytical, logical society feelings have been put on the back shelf described as being just “chick stuff,” (actually things typically thought of as masculine like sports and war are just as much about feelings) but if you truly want to receive your heart’s desire – then you must tune in to your feelings about it.  Again, to be a broken Rumi record, “What you seek is seeking you,” and that is completely true when it comes to your feelings.  Do you want to feel good, happy and loved in your partnership?  Then if you focus on those wonderful feelings when you think about your life in your ideal relationship, then you will attract the partner that is also seeking those feelings in a relationship.  If your feelings about being in a relationship are bad (mine were for quite some time years ago), then check in with yourself and ask, “What is the limiting belief that is causing me to feel this way?  Am I willing to transmute this into a new belief that serves me now?  What is the new belief that I’m willing to adopt to move forward with the love I truly desire?”

The more you focus on your good feelings about what it is you desire, the quicker it will come to you and the more enjoyable and authentic your results will be.

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In summary, clarify – What? Why? and How?  And get into those good feelings as much as possible! 

I hope this was helpful for you and gives you a good starting point in manifesting your dreams.  When have you manifested something wonderful in your life?  As always, I’d love to read your comments below.

Lots of Love & Good Feelings,

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Romancing with Deliberate Attraction versus Default Attraction

What is deliberate attraction?  The name is a reference to the Abraham-Hicks materials on Law of Attraction where they talk about the Law of Deliberate Creation.  You can watch a brief video with Esther Hicks talking about creating deliberately here.  In short, when we are intending to deliberately attract something into our lives we must first come into the feeling, energy, vibration or alignment of what it is that we truly want by focusing on what we want.

For example, when I was younger I wanted a man to come into my life and love me dearly and want to marry me.  I thought if I waited around long enough it would happen eventually.  The thought alone of my desire was not enough to make it happen. Truthfully, it was so out of alignment with my energy back then for many reasons; the idea of marriage scared me, I was fearful of getting hurt, I didn’t trust someone to be there for me and love me, and my heart was closed to giving and receiving love.  As a result, the relationships I was attracting by default were based in fear and neediness, which was just a reflection of my own energy at that time.  It never ended well needless to say.

This kind of default attraction is what most of us do in life because we weren’t taught to deliberately create our reality as a child.  There’s a lot of media (books, movies, TV, and dating advice columns) that encourages romance by default – like the notion of falling in love by locking eyes across a crowded room.  For the record, I do not recommend choosing anything, especially your life partner, by default attraction.  Default attraction happens when you haven’t thought in advance what you want in a relationship (it’s so important to know that) or what you value and are just “waiting” for the right one to come along, when you’re physically attracted to someone and just go for it, or just accept being in a relationship with someone who doesn’t treat you the way you would like.

And please don’t feel bad if you’ve done this.  I operated this way for most of my life and we are literally encouraged to act this way by popular entertainment.  If you’re feeling bad about it then know that is just your higher self telling you that it’s time to change and attract deliberately!

So in deliberate attraction, we clarify want we want and get into the good feeling space (or energy, vibration, etc.) of what it is we do want – not what we’re afraid of happening.  This can happen quickly or may take more time depending on the amount of negative energy someone has around what they desire.  What is the result of deliberately attracting our soul mate instead of mating by default?

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From my own personal experience I can honestly tell you that when I took deliberate charge of my love life, these were the results:

I had clarity and KNEW the type of man I would end up with in advance

It took the mystery and guessing games out of dating

I felt in charge and confident going on dates

I never felt pressured to have sex

I didn’t play into or focus on the undesirable behavior of anyone around me

I could be honest about what I wanted with others

I didn’t waste time with men that weren’t in alignment with me

The men I did meet, whether there was interest or not, respected me and were very nice

After only seven weeks of dating online with deliberate intent, I met the love of my life

Dating him felt good and was joyful

He is exactly the kind of man I deliberately wanted to draw into my life

Though we aren’t perfect people :), our marriage feels great and wonderful every day

Living deliberately in this way is a choice we can make every day with decisions big and small, beginning with our thoughts and intentions.  As strong women in this day and age it’s more important than ever to choose our love based on good feelings and that’s in alignment with our highest self, or God or Spirit.  Our partner must support the best woman we are capable of being.  Looking back I can’t believe I ever accepted less than that and I hope no woman feels she has to settle for less again.

black-87853_1920 In my next post I’ll give you three ways that you can begin deliberately attracting the love you want now!

For now I’d love your comments – Which goals or achievements in your life do you feel you created deliberately?  How do you feel when you think of those things?

With my heart full of love,

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What’s Finding Love Got To Do With Impacting the World?

If someone had told me I would someday coach women who want to find their true love I would have laughed my heinie off!  I didn’t play with Barbies much growing up or dream of being a princess.  As an independent, strong woman with big dreams and worldly ideas it felt impossible for me to focus on finding love when I was younger.  I thought I didn’t need anything from anyone as I could take care of myself, thank you.  Besides, there just seemed to be more pressing matters in the world, like injustice and violence, that I needed to take a stand for and read about in obsessive detail before I did anything about trying to find my “soul mate,” if such a thing existed.

I believed there were more important things to do first.  Some of which I acted on, like beginning a yoga and meditation practice and becoming an instructor, and many things that just stayed in my head, like having a big acting career so I could then change the world.  For many reasons I believed that having an awesome dream career, impacting the world in a positive way, being strong and independent and being deeply spiritual came before being in a loving partnership.  What was I thinking?

Flash forward to now, and a whole lot of learning later, here’s why I know now that being in an ideal partnership (if that is what one truly wants) allows one to fully express her highest potential in all four of those areas mentioned above.

Dream Career – The support of your ideal partner can actually fuel your drive and inspiration for career and business and allow you to stay focused on it.  Dating while pursuing a career can be very distracting.  It can be hard to stay focused on a path while falling in and out of love.  For me, having the loving support of my husband has given me a strong foundation and even more motivation to create the career path ideal for myself and our family’s future.  Also, graciously receiving and giving love has opened up my heart to accepting and giving abundance in a way that was blocked before.

Positive Impact On the World – Okay, I don’t know what I was thinking back then because what impacts the world more positively than soul love, being an example of that soul love in partnership to others and raising children in a happy, loving family?  Moving on…

Being Strong and Independent – I used to think that having to be with someone was a sign of my weakness but now I see that having to be alone, while silently wanting to be with someone, actually isn’t strong and definitely not independent.  Being in the ideal relationship while maintaining your strength and independence and respecting that of your partner’s trumps being strong and independent alone.  The two strong, loving individuals become an interdependent force together.

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Being spiritual – Huh?  Being spiritual has nothing to do with any external forms – married or single, smart or simple, prosperous or poor, etc. – as we are all spirit, all the time.  If the desire for a love partnership has been put in to your heart, then God or Spirit (or whatever form of the Divine you prefer) has put it there for you to express it.  Our greatest spiritual growth comes from the lessons we receive in relationships.  Our greatest dedication to God comes from our partnerships, romantic or otherwise, being of service in this world.  I’m experiencing greater spirituality with the support of my husband helping me to grow daily.

Of course those are just my examples as to why I didn’t think it was necessary and even embarrassed to focus on love before.  Do you have any reasons for putting love off?  Across the board, any reason or excuse that delays you from living the life of your absolute dreams is just a fear-based belief that is not serving you.  We are here to live fearlessly and in our highest potential, all the time.

For the love and benefit of the entire world, get clear on your dreams and heart’s desires and live them!

What are your reasons for putting love off for later?  I’d love to read your comments.

With Love,

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Saying Yes to Your Vision

When I was single I lived in some kind of vast vague-land where any possible future vision of love would have been fine and figured I’d just know it when it happened.  I said to myself things like, “If the right man comes along then I might get married,” “I’ll just know him when I meet him,” and, “Maybe I’ll have kids, I’ll see when that time comes.”

The problem is that there isn’t anything closely resembling commitment in any of those statements.  I said and thought words like “if,” “maybe,” “when,” and “might.”  There wasn’t any decision on my part as to what I wanted and certainly no talk of wanting that NOW.  I might as well have just said, “I’m going to sit back right here, wait for my true love to saunter into my world and fall in love with me so hard that he will just tell me what HE wants and drag me along with him.”

And anyone that knows me knows that I’m a strong woman that doesn’t like to be told what to do let alone be dragged.  Oh no.  So, what the heck was my problem back then?  For many personal reasons (better saved for future posts) I lacked commitment. You know, the big C word that normally precedes being in a relationship?  When I realized this I wondered, “If I can’t commit to what I want then how can I commit to a partner and expect him to commit to me?”  So then I did the work on myself and got very clear about my real vision of love – to get married and start a family.  And I seriously committed to it.

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The result was that as my vision became crystal clear my thoughts, my dreams, my words, my actions, my friends, my social life, and my whole life became a reflection of my future love life.  In only a matter of months I did meet my husband to be.

If you’re unclear about what it is you want in love and you’re ready for something different than you have currently (where you’re at is totally okay, too, you being ready is most important), here are 3 steps you can take now to help you along:

1)    Make a list of all possible ways you can be in a love relationship: for example but not limited to – married, not married but living together, children or none, opposite or same sex (if that’s unclear for you, which is not uncommon), dating only, single and happy – anything that comes to you.  Then re-read your list and imagine each scenario as if it’s in your life now.  Honestly ask yourself, “Which one makes me feel the best?”  Circle the one or few of them that stood out to you.

2)    Write or imagine the story of this situation or situations.  It doesn’t matter if this is in your life now or not or how much you think you can have this or not.  For now, you’re just playing with your imagination.  How do you feel?  Are you happy here?  If it’s what you think you want but doesn’t feel good there might be some deeper work for you to do on limiting beliefs created by past experiences.  If one of them makes your heart sing then move on to…

3)    Commit to your vision of love in your life.  Write down and say out loud, “I commit to attracting (your vision story) into my life and living from this place now.”  Read or imagine your story and commitment as much as you can.  Tell friends and family.  Take actions that will bring you closer to your vision.

Committing to what I want in love and in other areas of my life has been a powerful force for growth and living my dreams.  I hope you’re enjoying your life in all aspects on this journey of love!

Now you’re turn – what commitments have you made in your life that brought you success?  Please leave comments below!

Lots of love,

Dina R.

Welcome, Deliberate Creators of Love and Life!

Hello and welcome!  Thank you for taking the time for check out my blog site, I sincerely hope you find it inspiring.  My name is Dina Robison, some of you may know me as Dina Prioste (my maiden name).  I’m a yoga and meditation instructor but did you know that I also guide women to attract the love they truly desire?  This site will feature articles related to inspiration, empowerment, and personal growth in love.  Loving on purpose and with a purpose!

Why coach women who want true love?  I’ll save the detailed response for a future post but, in short, my life has been completely transformed from one of stark independence, loneliness, fear and doubt into one of interdependence, empowerment, joy and love that I had never before dreamed was possible, (as seen in the picture below.)  Image

Once I got clear deep soul love happened for me in a very short time.  So I truly believe that any woman who wants it too and commits herself to the path will have the same happen for her.  I am here to offer you the insights, tips and inspiration that I discovered on my journey to love.

In the meantime if you have any questions, ideas or stories about attracting your ideal partner, please comment – I’d love to hear your thoughts!

With Love & Happiness,

Dina R.