Tag Archives: Entertainment

How the Couples You See in Entertainment Affect the Relationship You Attract

A few weeks ago a friend mentioned to me that when she was a child watching the Flintstones, for some reason, made her sad.  At first, I thought, that’s strange.  Then she explained it’s because it always felt really intense to her, like everyone was mad at each other all of the time.  Then I remembered that the Flintstones was the children’s equivalent to The Honeymooners.  You know the – “One of these days, POW right in the kisser!” – Honeymooners.  It makes perfect sense why the Flintstones would be sad for a child to see, and the Honeymooners sad for adults to see.

Over the years there have been countless sitcoms, films and even cartoons (!!) depicting couples as constantly bickering, complaining about and fighting with each other.  Over the decades the fighting has evolved from threats of physical violence, to hysteric yelling, to nasty insults, and to now what seems to be childish rants against each other.  I rarely watch television anymore but recently I watched a comedy show about a married couple only because a friend of mine was guest starring on it, unfortunately not until the very end.  It was the last time I would watch it because the main stars (who I like as performers) were constantly hurling mean insults back and forth like 3rd graders (really mean ones that is) at a playground…for the duration.  Somehow this is supposed to be funny.

As a kid that watched a lot of television growing up, I actually believed this to be the norm – which reminds me of Norm on Cheers, another man always displeased with his wife.  These fictional characters were a big part of my energetic influence and I unknowingly took on the belief that men and women cannot be happy in marriage, or together at all.  I took on the belief that men and women that cared about each other showed it by fighting with each other and insulting each other.  Those beliefs resulted in my early relationships centering on verbal abuse and fighting.

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Of course we can say that it’s just TV or a movie, it isn’t real, but doesn’t our mainstream entertainment “normalize” what we see?  Everything is energy, so if we aren’t conscious can’t we easily take on the energy of our favorite entertainment?  Similarly to what I mentioned in the posts about male and female characters, the character of the “couple” in media has gotten further and further away from the soul mate relationship that I, and I assume you if you’re reading this, want to be in.

So what can you do?  Ask yourself what do you really want your relationship to be like?  Not what you think you can or cannot have based on what you see, but what do you really want?  Write it down.  Talk it out with a friend.  If you’re a creative type, write a story or a script on it. 

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What else is helpful to raise your energy to that of the relationship you desire?  Change the channel.  Shut off the TV.  Seek out media with couples that are like the soul mate relationship you want to have (recently I enjoyed Date Night and Up).  Support those that are making the kind of entertainment that is positively feeding your soul and your partnership. 

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There is a new paradigm for our partnerships that is coming forward now to be the norm.  It isn’t that of our parents and grandparents who largely depended on each other in marriage.  New partnerships are based on mutual respect, support, interdependence and love.  Our partnership supports our spiritual growth individually and as a couple.  I’ll even be so bold as to say this partnership supports the evolution of the collective consciousness and the entire planet. 

The sooner that kind of partnership can be reflected in our entertainment, the sooner it can be reflected in partnerships across the globe.

What is your favorite couple in entertainment?  I’m always on the look out for positive and uplifting shows to watch, so please let me know.

With Love,

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How Women You See in Entertainment Affects Your Energy and Whom You Attract

In 2005 I went to see a movie (I just realized this is my third post in a row beginning like this) that was a big budget, action/fantasy based on a graphic novel.  There’s something about seeing a movie in the theater, super-sized on the screen with full surround sound that makes is so effective and, well, real.

Unfortunately in this film targeted to young males, the women were not represented in a very encouraging way.  All the female characters, except one, were prostitutes or a stripper that appeared between the ages of 18 to 25.  The one female character that wasn’t a prostitute was a cop (encouraging)…and she bared her breasts (not encouraging).  All the male characters (also killer/assassin types) appeared between the ages of 40 and 50 and were very grungy looking types compared to the innocent prettiness of the females.

Watching this film was, surprisingly, the first time it really hit me that women are sadly misrepresented in popular entertainment and that I really felt the negativity and heaviness of the women in that film.  It was the first time a film affected me energetically like that.  Over the years I’ve noticed more and more how women are portrayed grossly…

Sassy, independent gals that sleep with guy after guy in just about every episode in an effort to find true love. The beautiful super heroine who kills without blinking but says that love is for children.  The romantic prostitute that finds her prince charming after he hires her for her services.  I’ll stop here, you get the picture.  And I haven’t watched very much popular entertainment in the last few years – currently there are more and more romantic comedies featuring the female lead as only wanting something casual, love not coming in to the equation until the very end.

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In these instances, and in many other examples in entertainment, females are represented as being only worthwhile for sexual pleasure or violence and being totally heartless.  And being that watching entertainment can be such a powerful experience, these images can really affect the energy of viewers.  Myself and a lot of women have at some point taken on, unknowingly, the energy and traits of these types of characters.

** On a side note, if you think I’m exaggerating I recently attended a talk about sex trafficking and the speaker, who works with rehabilitating girls after prostitution, said that many of the girls actually believe the Pretty Woman fantasy that they will meet their rich, prince Charming that way.

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So how does all of this affect you, who wants to attract and meet the love of your life?  Well, if you take on the energy of the entertainment you watch it may affect you (along with watching male characters) by energetically changing the way you show up in your relationships with men.  Some instances based on the examples above: taking on an overly sexual energy before establishing love in a relationship, behaving cold in an effort to be more appealing, or basically being a doormat in the name of love while the desired guy finally decides he wants to be with you.  This kind of energy can create an imbalance- too strong of masculine characteristics with very little feminine.  A divine female has a balance of both the masculine and the feminine.  She’s strong but has an open, loving heart.

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What kind of energy do you want in your long-term partnership?  Do you want to be anything other than your self in your relationship?  How do you want to be and be loved in your relationship?

As with male characters – find examples of females that are like how you want to be in love and life.  Look for the energy of a woman that is balanced in both her feminine and masculine traits.  She’s strong in the positive difference she’s making in the world but has an open heart to fully love her man and her family unconditionally.  Look for women that are where you want to be, and take on their energy!

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Who are you favorite, inspiring female characters in entertainment?  I’m always looking for good recommendations for uplifting movies or television shows, so please let me know if you got any.

Next week, my last article on this topic – the couples we see in entertainment and how that affects our relationships.

With Love,

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How the Men You See in Entertainment Affects Whom You Attract & How to Change It

A few weeks ago I saw the #1 comedy in America in the theater, which I won’t bother to name.  It had a few funny moments and featured some talented actors – the point of this article isn’t to bash the movie, I knew what I was getting into.  But I left the theater feeling grossed out and sad about the vision of what it means to be a man that a movie like that sends to both female and male viewers.  This vision is of a man that does drugs (a LOT), plays video games all day, speaks in sexual innuendos (a LOT), and only mentions women in the context of pornography or rape – both of which are not funny in the slightest. 

This got me thinking about other prominent male characters in mass entertainment: the good looking but totally ruthless and emotionless assassin, the hunky player that “changes” for the girl next door, the mysterious super hero that fights and kills bad guys who usually likes a girl but he can never be around, the “messed up” guy that’s getting over his issues, and the profanity blazing and drug using but lovable oaf type (he also might change for a girl). 

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Everything is energy.  What we see, hear, taste, touch, smell, and sense is energy that we are taking in and that is affecting our thoughts and beliefs.  Our thoughts and beliefs affect our feelings, which then affects what energy we are being/living and radiating out.  Because the law of attraction is always working that energy brings to us in our physical world things that match that energy.  Do you see where I’m going with this?

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So if you continuously see images of men in entertainment (and I love going to the movies, too, so this was a challenge for me) that are mean, violent, crude, sick, a total player, and downright disrespectful to women – and most popular movies nowadays feature such men – then it will affect your thoughts, beliefs, feelings and energy towards men and relationships.  But you have the choice to believe and think what you want about men and relationships.

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So what can you do? 

1) Look for images of men that represent the type of man you would want to marry.  The type of man that you can see yourself spending the rest of your life with.  The type of man that cares about you and cares about the world.  The type of man that loves children and would never hurt anyone.  Okay, I’ll move on before I get too excited myself here….

What qualities do you want in YOUR man? 

2) Focus your attention on those qualities as you find evidence of them.  Notice men like him in movies, books, pictures, and in real life, of course.  What you focus on expands. 

How do you want to feel in your relationship? 

3) Look for entertainment that gives you the good feelings you want in your life. Notice how you feel when you do watch a male character.  If it doesn’t feel good to you, recognize that it’s just entertainment and not reality.  Look for movies and shows featuring males with good qualities that you love.  My husband and I are always looking for more positive and uplifting movies and shows to watch, and more and more are being produced thanks to great organizations like the Global Alliance for Transformational Entertainment. 

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Don’t let someone else’s idea of entertainment define your relationship story.  You get to write your own story.  And if you come across any great movies or shows that are uplifting and positive, please let me know by commenting or at dinarobisoncoaching at gmail dot com.  I’m always on the look out for them!

Next week – How the Women You See in Entertainment Affects Whom You Attract 🙂  Until then…

With Love & Light,

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