She was an amazing woman and still felt obligated to sleep with men by the third date.
She was a client of mine earlier this year — gorgeous, intelligent, kind, with a prosperous and fulfilling career. Yet she still didn’t think she had the option to wait to sleep with a guy until she was sure about him.
This broke my heart. It also breaks my heart because I know she’s far from the only one. And I remember my younger self buying into that as well.
So first let me just say this: you can sleep with a guy for the first time whenever you damn well please – be it the first date or on your honeymoon.
When he’s your soulmate, he will want it to be right for you.
So I felt inspired to tackle this topic and did some digging (ahem, Googling). I found out there’s been quite of bit of authoritative research about the optimal time to first hit the sack when dating for a serious relationship or marriage.
In my latest blog post, When is the Right Time to Have Sex?, I share my client’s story and several pieces of scientific evidence that do say, yes, there is an ideal time for sleeping with someone you’re dating if seeking a lasting relationship.
The results are fascinating, so check it out here.
Oh, and I know some of you are saying, “But my cousin slept with her husband on the first date and they’ve been happily married for 34 years!”
There are always exceptions to just about anything. But exceptions aren’t the rule or even the ideal. Check out what the research says about it here.
Happy holidays! May this season bring you many blessings and joy!